Zoë Stagg

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12 posts tagged retro

I don’t know what games you’re supposed to play with your Barbies — fashion shows or date nights maybe? Mine only played “going to college.”

All of my Barbie furniture, including the pink locker that came with the Gym Set (pic included because the web is a magical place to surf) was appropriated to furnish Barbie’s dorm room.

I’m not sure what I thought college was, but if it was anything like these pictures, the mythos was not misplaced.

Also, vintage Apple.

Much like I don’t like books or movies the first time through, food is always better in reprise, too. If toast is my favorite food, “leftovers” is my second favorite.
(I managed to cook the whole shebang without consulting the internet OR the momternet. Weird. This surely must be a milestone of Butterball proportions.)

usnatarchivesexhibits:






“Give It Style. Leftovers can Taste Good and Look Good.” 1941 - 1945 


Item from the Office of Government Reports, 1932 - 1947.

Much like I don’t like books or movies the first time through, food is always better in reprise, too. If toast is my favorite food, “leftovers” is my second favorite.

(I managed to cook the whole shebang without consulting the internet OR the momternet. Weird. This surely must be a milestone of Butterball proportions.)

usnatarchivesexhibits:


“Give It Style. Leftovers can Taste Good and Look Good.” 1941 - 1945
 
Item from the Office of Government Reports, 1932 - 1947.

Wisdom…

This week take time to celebrate well, November 17th: Wise Owl Day.

“Come live with me in a hollow tree, little Owl,” said the Big Brown Bear.

“Though it’s cold as ice, we’ll be warm and nice with the two of us living there.”

But the Owl said as he shook his head, “Mr. Bear, that will never do.”

“For if I know my name, when the springtime came, there’d be nobody left but you.”

Wise Little Owl! exclamation mark included, is the November 17th poem from The Golden Book of 365 Stories, the story/poem/rip off (Oh Mommy ! I’ll be the only one wearing a rain coat and rubbers!) a-day book that was read in our house conservatively 17 times.

That owl gets smarter and smarter, the older I get.

GPOYW: The Trick or Treat Edition. 
Well, kids. Just because I’m in the swamp, doesn’t mean that you all shouldn’t be amused.
Okay! Here you are then.
Left: That would be an actual legit Glamour Shot circa 1994. Even better, it was taken thanks to a coupon for a free sitting that I got at cheer camp. Yep, it just gets cooler and cooler, don’t it?
Right: Exactly twice as old, just in a different costume, one that I will be wearing a week from today at the promotion board. Hence, part of the swamped.
Somehow side-by-side it’s like a photographic pitch for an updated Major Dad, one with a rebellious daughter in an 80s throwback band. That, or there’s really no good explanation.
Hoot at will.

GPOYW: The Trick or Treat Edition.

Well, kids. Just because I’m in the swamp, doesn’t mean that you all shouldn’t be amused.

Okay! Here you are then.

Left: That would be an actual legit Glamour Shot circa 1994. Even better, it was taken thanks to a coupon for a free sitting that I got at cheer camp. Yep, it just gets cooler and cooler, don’t it?

Right: Exactly twice as old, just in a different costume, one that I will be wearing a week from today at the promotion board. Hence, part of the swamped.

Somehow side-by-side it’s like a photographic pitch for an updated Major Dad, one with a rebellious daughter in an 80s throwback band. That, or there’s really no good explanation.

Hoot at will.

You Don’t Know From Sad Kirk Cameron…

So the sad Kirk Cameron Subway shindig that allegedly wasn’t so sad?

If you haven’t seen Listen to Me on the original vintage VHS, you cannot judge.

It’s a movie about a college debate team circa 1989, which not even the author of its very own wikipedia page cares to note centered around the fact that scholarship-kid Kirk Cameron was so poor in high school that he had RICKETS.

That was the disease they picked. In almost the 90s. Rickets.

But wait! There’s more!

The team eventually wins a chance to debate the issue of abortion in front of the Supreme Court. Along the way, the students learn lessons about life, love, friendship, and politics.

Abortion. In front of the Supreme Court.

I dabbled in debate in a college where the only championships painted on the side of our athletic bus were: Women’s Basketball, 1992; and Debate [all the rest of the years].

It is, therefore, the greatest sports film of all time.

Top 5 I Wants, I Never Gots…

Call it The Great Memorial ‘Lil Tykes Coupe list. No matter how fortunate your childhood (and mine was) there are those things you PINED for and never got. The unrequited wants.

For whatever silly reason, they were the toys your friends had that you coveted, the things you schemed your allowance toward and never saved enough, or they were just too fleeting, too trendy to be deemed a real need. I NEVER GOT A COUPE. This kid is so lucky.

Clearly, you survived.

That doesn’t mean that looking back on them doesn’t paint a real clear picture of how awesome it coulda been…

Call me! The Swatch twin phone — not only do you have your own phone jack in your ROOM, but two of you can talk at the same time attached by a cord! Think of the important business you could conduct. On your landline. (Related: Europe must be single-handedly keeping Swatch ticking. It’s everywhere.)

Guess who? My rear end never had a triangle on it, but not for lack of trying, every Back-to-School shopping trip from 89-92. My rear end just never fit in the things. Acid-washed sighs.

Freeze Frame! It was the 80s. It wasn’t enough to have a phone or a camera — they had to contain the pink-teal-lavender-yellow-PEACH palette. And some faux-Esprit french, right Le Clic?

I’ll Be in My Office… A loft bed with a desk under it? COME ON. It’s second only to a secret passage. Hi, Webster. This childhood deprivation will get taken out on nieces and nephews, mark my words and sign for the delivery.

Put Your Foot Down and Drive… You can’t have a Coupe list without showing the progression (psychological damage?) of what such disappointment can do to your taste in cars forever. This is the only vehicle I’ve ever wanted. It’s a 1990 Geo Metro. It is the closest thing to a toy the DMV will allow on the road.

In retrospect, it’s not so much a list, as an autobiography…

(What did you always want that you never got? Pics or it didn’t happen…)

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